He's here all week...

Doctor Collins: So, yeah. You recall that you came in and you felt that you had an unusual infection.
Me: Flesh-eating Azerbaijani Nose-rot. Yes.
Doctor Collins: I was scathing.
Me: You were.
Doctor Collins: Because, among other things, there is actually no such condition.
Me: And yet I have it.
Doctor Collins: Well, that is in fact true. You do.
Me: What?
Doctor Collins: Yup.
Me: What?
Doctor Collins: I know. Surprised the hell out of me, too.
Me: But...
Doctor Collins: The tests were pretty conclusive. Nose-rot.
Me: But...
Doctor Collins: So we should talk about treatments.
Me: Seriously?
Doctor Collins: Dude, no. Don't be ridiculous.
Me: Then -
Doctor Collins: I was messing with you.
Me: You're hilarious.
Doctor Collins: I know, right?